Disadvantages Of Marrying A Younger Woman
“Most guys don’t want to be called “”old man.”” It’s not what we think of when we imagine ourselves in our 40s and 50s. We envision ourselves as rugged cowboys or sophisticated businessmen — neither of which need their wives to be 30 years younger than them.
But let me ask you this: do you know anyone who has never been embarrassed by his bride-to-be’s youthfulness? I certainly don’t. And if you’re one of those guys, then you probably already have an answer for my question. But even so, it seems like there should be something about young brides that make us cringe. The fact is, they really aren’t all good things. In fact, they can sometimes bring out some pretty nasty traits in us.
In other words, while being married to a much younger woman may seem like a great idea at first glance (I’m dating someone half my age!), there are definitely some drawbacks that come along with it. Here are just a few.
She might get bored with you. Sure, you offer financial security. You might be offering her more money than she could ever hope to earn on her own. That said, you can end up spending too much time away from home, giving her little opportunities to develop interests outside of yours. If your marriage is going to last long term, you’ll both have to work together to find activities that interest both of you.
You can also get comfortable with the way things were before you got married. There was no one else involved; the only person you had to please was yourself. Your new life partner will have expectations of you, whether or not you realize it. If you’ve always felt secure with doing whatever you wanted, you may start feeling insecure once you become accustomed to living with another adult.
You can get uncomfortable with the others’ perception of your relationship. When you date someone who is several years younger than you, people tend to assume your feelings for her are less serious than if you dated someone closer to your same age. They assume you’re having fun, and maybe even flirting, with her.
It can be difficult to explain how you truly feel about someone when everyone around you thinks you’re playing games. This can lead to resentment between you and your spouse. At best, this can result in constant fighting over silly things. At worst, it can cause you to cheat on each other.
Younger women often complain that older men are condescending toward them. While you may not mean to act this way, it happens anyway. As soon as you become comfortable with someone you love, you can lose touch with what you initially thought of them. Suddenly, they become someone you see as beneath you because you chose to marry them instead of someone your own age.
Having a younger wife makes you feel older. Most guys hate growing old. One reason why is that aging usually involves losing muscle mass and tone, making wrinkles appear, and slowing down. These changes can affect how we interact with others. Our confidence can take a hit, especially if we didn’t prepare for these changes ahead of time.
When you add a very youthful woman into the mix, you risk taking your mind off these issues, which leads to complacency. Instead of preparing mentally and physically for these inevitable changes, you’re likely to spend more of your energy trying to keep up with her.
This is especially true if you weren’t self-sufficient before getting married. Now you have to prove you still know how to live independently. Otherwise, you’ll look foolish in front of her.
Finally, it’s impossible to ignore the obvious. Women mature faster than men, and typically reach physical maturity earlier than they do emotionally. Since most men want to remain virile well into their 60s, they often prefer to date women their own age or slightly older. However, younger women are attractive to many men, regardless of their age.
So, is there anything to gain from dating a younger woman? Yes, there is. Many younger women are genuinely happy to be with older men. After all, they treat them better than most would expect. Plus, they help them grow as human beings and show them that there’s nothing wrong with wanting to have fun and enjoy themselves.”