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How To Tell If Someone Hates You

by Lyndon Langley
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How To Tell If Someone Hates You

How To Tell If Someone Hates You

The biggest indicator that someone doesn’t like you isn’t necessarily what they say to your face or how they treat you. It’s often what they do and don’t do when you’re not around others. They may look at you, but it’s as if they’ve seen an invisible wall between them and you. And when the two of you are alone together, they keep their distance.
You might think this person is just shy, but in reality, it could be something more. They could actually hate you – and there are some telltale signs that will let you know for sure.
They distance themselves from you. Their arms are always crossed around you. There is a lack of eye contact. Everything seems forced. Their feet are pointed away from you. Likewise, their torsos are pointed away from you. Surprisingly, too much eye contact can mean they dislike you, too.
If you were ever close friends with someone who didn’t really like you, you probably saw these behaviors before. What you may have thought was awkwardness or discomfort is actually hatred. But why would anyone hate you? Let’s take a closer look.
1. The “I’m Not Really Listening” Conversation
This one has been used by me, my husband, our kids, even our dogs against each other. As soon as I start talking, they tune out completely. Sometimes they pretend to listen, but they aren’t truly listening because they are thinking about the next thing to say. Or maybe they want to change the subject entirely. This makes me feel so frustrated! Why won’t they just stop interrupting me?
This behavior shows disrespect. It also shows disinterest. When someone interrupts you, you should be willing to give them your undivided attention. If you don’t want to talk about whatever topic is being discussed, then simply say so. Don’t make up excuses why you need to go now (e.g., “I’m late for work.”) That type of attitude says “you don’t matter.” Instead, ask nicely to wrap things up early.
2. They Use A Fake Smile As An Excuse For Talking Over You
When you try to talk to them, they’ll smile politely and act happy to meet you. Then they’ll start talking over you again. They won’t shut up long enough for you to get a word in edgewise.
Their fake smiles are designed to throw you off, and they’re effective. Your brain subconsciously knows when someone is faking and goes into defense mode. You think, “What’s wrong with her/him?” So, instead of feeling annoyed at the speaker, you end up annoyed at yourself. After all, you should be able to communicate better than this.
3. They Refuse To Answer Questions Directed At Them
Some people refuse to answer any questions asked of them. Ever heard someone yell back, “Don’t question me!”? That’s exactly what this means. They are protecting themselves from having their feelings hurt. By doing this, they avoid opening up to you.
4. They Treat You Like One Of Their Friends
It’s hard to believe that someone who hates you would consider treating you like a friend. However, sometimes they do. Either way, it’s a sign. They use their friendship with you to manipulate you. They use their friendships with other people to control those relationships. In essence, they are playing everyone else while avoiding you.
5. They Constantly Complain About Something
Complaining is a classic form of manipulation. People who complain constantly put you on the defensive. You feel guilty for asking why they are complaining about something.
6. They Talk Down To You
People who hate you talk down to you because they see you as less-than. They don’t realize that they are making themselves feel superior by putting you down.
7. They Attack Your Character Rather Than Discuss the Issue
Sometimes, the problem comes from within the person who hates you. Maybe it’s due to jealousy or insecurity. Whatever the reason, they attack your character rather than discuss the issue. They criticize you for things you haven’t done, said, or thought.
8. They Disagree With You Without Providing Any Evidence
A common tactic used by haters is to disagree without providing evidence. They don’t want to hear your opinion, so they argue against yours. For example, if you state that you’re going somewhere, they’ll respond, “No, you’re not,” without offering any proof. Or, if you suggest something, they’ll shoot down your suggestion with a statement such as, “That wouldn’t work for us.”
9. They Interrupt Other People While Allowed You To Finish Your Thought
Interrupting another person is rude. It’s disrespectful and annoying. Yet, people who hate you love to do this. If given the chance, they will interrupt other people while allowing you to finish your thoughts.
10. They Make Negative Comments About Yourself Behind Your Back
Many times, people who hate you will make negative comments about yourself behind your back. Even worse, they’ll do this while you’re present. These types of comments are meant to demoralize you and bring you down.
11. They Take Advantage Of Your Good Nature
Although many people use good manners to hide their true intentions, haters don’t care. They are only concerned with their own gain. They abuse your kindness and generosity.
12. They Act Friendly But Never Reach Out To You
They claim to like you, yet they never show it. They approach you, but they stay short distances away. They are friendly, but they never reach out to you.
13. They Say Nice Things About You To Others…But Not To You
These nice things are usually compliments. They are intended to please others, but they are not sincere. They are trying to convince others that they like you.
14. They Ignore You Completely
Ignoring you feels like rejection. Some people who hate you ignore you altogether. They forget that you exist. Or, they walk right past you so quickly they barely notice you are there.
15. They Try To Engage You In Small Talk
Small talk is meaningless conversation that focuses on small details. People who hate you rarely engage in meaningful conversations. They don’t want to open up; they merely want to connect superficially.
16. They Are Jealous Of Your Successes
They are jealous of your successes. They wish they had achieved similar success. Unfortunately for them, they failed to learn how to appreciate what they already have.
17. They Want To Hurt You Because Of Past History
Your history with this person is important. They are lashing out because of your previous relationship(s) with them. They are angry about something you did years ago.
18. They Have No Sense Of Empathy For Your Situation
When you attempt to explain your situation to them, they become impatient and dismissive. They fail to understand what you are saying.
19. They Think You’re Useless
In their eyes, you are useless. They see you as nothing more than a tool. They view you as incapable of accomplishing anything worthwhile.
20. You Can Feel Unwanted
Because they hate you, you feel unwanted. They are using you as a stepping stone for their personal growth. They are not interested in your happiness or well-being.
21. They Put You On A Pedestal
As mentioned earlier, they only care about themselves. They elevate you above them. They make you seem special. And, although you may think you deserve it, they don’t value you as much as you value yourself.
22. They Lack Self Confidence
Self confidence is essential for healthy relationships. Hatred destroys self esteem. They are insecure and lack confidence in their ability to accomplish their goals.
23. They Look For Signs That You Hate Them
Most people who hate you are very observant. They pay close attention to everything you do and say. They watch for subtle cues. They look for physical reactions you may have after meeting them.
24. They Believe You Will Cause Them Pain Later
They believe that someday you will cause them pain. They imagine you will betray them or cheat on them. They think that somehow you will harm their reputation.
25. They Fear You Might Cheat On Them Someday
They fear that you might leave them for someone better. They worry that you will ultimately find someone who loves you more. They don’t trust or respect themselves around you.
26. They Worry You May Be Better Off Without Them
They worry that you may be happier without them in your life. They assume you will experience greater joy in life without them. Therefore, they resent you for your success.
27. They Project Their Own Fears Onto You
They project their fears onto you. They think you are capable of doing the same things they fear. They hate themselves for feeling unworthy of you.
28. They Wish You Would Just Go Away Already
They wish you would just disappear. They’d prefer you to stay gone forever. They don’t want you ruining their lives anymore.
29. They Suffer From Impostor Syndrome
They suffer from impostor syndrome.

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