Is It Ok To Be A Loner
Is It Ok To Be A Loner? Ever since I was a little kid I’ve been a bit of a loner. Sure, I had my best friend at home but she wasn’t exactly an active part of my daily or even weekly routine. If we were together then it would typically be because we wanted something from each other (like food). She didn’t know what to do when I came over so she usually sat on her butt watching TV while I played video games.
I’m not saying that’s bad, but sometimes I feel like I got teased and ridiculed by my classmates for having such a boring friend. The truth is, however, I think I’ve become much happier as an adult. In fact, some people might say I became “too” happy. There are days where I just want to stay inside all day long, watch movies, read books, play video games, and hang out with no one else than my cat.
Most of these days pass without me feeling lonely. When they do happen, I remember why I’m doing this and try to make sure I get back into the groove of things as soon as possible. Of course, there are also times where I miss hanging out with friends and family members more often. But, during those times I remind myself that I have plenty going on in my life already and don’t need anyone else’s approval to enjoy it.
The reason I write about this topic today is because I recently heard someone say that if you’re a loner then you probably have depression. After thinking about it for awhile, I started wondering if there really is anything wrong with spending time alone once in awhile. Sure, maybe you never talk to your parents. You may never go out with your friends. And you definitely never call any of them.
But, does that mean you should start taking medication? Does it mean you shouldn’t try to find new friends? Does it mean you won’t ever experience true love?
Studies seem to indicate that being a loner can lead to happiness for the individual and could actually be good for your health. This research suggests that being a loner doesn’t necessarily mean you will live a life full of misery.
One Study On Loneliness & Happiness
A recent study published in the Journal of Research in Personality indicates that loneliness isn’t always bad for us. According to researcher Dr. Ronda Cohen, socializing too often can cause us to lose our sense of self-worth. As a result, we could end up becoming very unhappy.
In her study, Cohen interviewed several hundred college students who either lived off campus or had apartments nearby. Her results showed that most of these students spent around two hours per week interacting with others outside of class. What she found interesting was that many of these same students viewed themselves as “lonely.”
What this indicated to Cohen was that although these students believed they needed to spend more time with their peers, they still felt their lives lacked purpose. They weren’t fully satisfied with how their lives were progressing.
It seems that for these students, their lack of connection with others was causing them to feel empty inside. One way to deal with this problem would be to reach out to friends and family members more often. Another solution would be to look for meaningful ways to fill this void within yourself.
Another Study On Loneliness
This study has led me to wonder whether some of us might be better off spending time alone instead of constantly seeking out new friendships. One thing I do know is that if I’m missing out on valuable opportunities to meet new people, I’ll certainly take advantage of them sooner rather than later.
The study mentioned above revealed that living far away from your loved ones can have a negative effect on your well-being. Spending time with your family can help improve your moods and feelings of fulfillment. These researchers discovered that loneliness occurs when you feel disconnected from others.
Spending Time With Yourself
If you believe you’re going through a phase where you’re struggling with finding meaning in your life, consider using some free resources online to connect with others. For example, you can join groups on Facebook, MySpace, and Twitter. Or you can use services like Meetup.com, Classmates.com, Yahoo! Groups, Google Groups, LiveJournal, and blogs.
You can also check out sites like eHarmony and Match.com. These services offer users a chance to interact with hundreds of singles looking for relationships.
Also, keep in mind that you don’t need to leave your house to have fun. Your local library, bookstore, movie theater, supermarket, park, zoo, aquarium, museum, and even school gymnasium are all great places to meet new people and possibly make lifelong friends.
As I said before, I used to be a loner. At least, that’s what I thought. Recently, though, I realized that I am capable of enjoying myself almost every single day. Why? Because I decided to change my perspective on what it means to be a loner. Instead of labeling people like me as losers, I now see them as people who are trying to figure things out.
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