Why Do We Kiss With Our Eyes Closed
When we kiss, most people don’t have much trouble focusing their attention elsewhere. Most adults are pretty adept at not staring directly into someone else’s mouth for long periods of time. It’s awkward to stare straight down an open maw, especially when you’re in the throes of passion. But most people aren’t teenagers, who seem to be able to maintain eye contact indefinitely without blinking.
In fact, it’s kind of hard to say whether anyone should ever attempt to keep his or her eyes closed during a kiss. The general consensus seems to be that if someone wants to kiss you with his or her eyes open, it’s because he or she has something important to tell you (or maybe is just being polite). If they want to try to get busy with you while keeping one eye open, then there must be some reason they think you need to know about what’s going on — perhaps they’ve seen a scary movie or read a particularly suspenseful book. When you kiss someone, though, even if you’re doing it out of politeness, it’s usually pretty obvious why you’d want to keep your eyes shut.
Kissing is generally considered a fairly private activity, but if you were to take a peek at any two random couples smooching in public, you’d probably notice that many people keep their eyes closed. In addition to the aforementioned reasons, sometimes people close their eyes because they simply don’t want to look too closely at each other’s mouths. The closer you get to another person’s mouth, the easier it becomes to see every tiny imperfection. You start noticing all sorts of little things that you wouldn’t normally pay such close attention to, like lipstick stains and dark spots under the eyes. So instead of taking in those details, which might make you uncomfortable, you just cover up everything except the lips.
But keeping your eyes closed isn’t always about avoiding embarrassment or discomfort; sometimes it’s actually a strategy designed to help you relax. Keep reading to find out why this may be true.
The Power of Relaxation While kissing, we often become tense and anxious. Keeping our eyes closed helps us calm down by removing visual distractions.
Eye Contact Is Contagious One theory proposes that we use facial expressions to send signals back and forth between people. These signals help us understand what the other person is thinking and feeling. During a kiss, if both partners’ eyes stay closed, then the signal gets broken, and the couple loses the ability to communicate effectively.
A Possible Sign of Love Scientists once thought that the amount of skin exposed when someone keeps his or her eyes closed was related to how strongly he or she felt about the person being kissed. This idea turned out to be false, however. Now researchers believe that the degree of openness depends upon how comfortable the person feels with the situation and the circumstances surrounding it. People who are nervous or shy may tend to show less sensitivity than others do, meaning that they don’t necessarily reveal as much personal information through their actions.
Closing Your Eyes Makes You Feel Vulnerable Some people argue that closing your eyes makes you feel vulnerable, because you’re less likely to protect yourself against attack. Others say that you shouldn’t worry about being attacked while kissing, because you’ll already be naked and spread apart. Still others claim that having your eyes closed while kissing allows you to focus solely on what your partner is feeling and thinking. If you’re worried about protecting yourself, you could always hold hands instead.
If you really want to test this vulnerability theory, ask a friend to sneak up behind you while you’re kissing and grab you around the waist. See how quickly you react!
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