Why Do Women Scream During Sex
It’s a common assumption that female pleasure is more subtle than male pleasure. But there are plenty of examples in which women scream or yell during sex — and some of them seem pretty loud! For example, one study out this year found that many of the women who participated did make noise but not necessarily while they were having an orgasm. Instead, 66 percent said that they screamed during sex to help their partners reach climax faster, and 87 percent stated that they vocalized during sex to boost his self-esteem. Another study has shown that when men listen to music like heavy metal or hard rock during intercourse, it can heighten their arousal and lead to better performance [sources: Bogaer, et al.,]. And yet another research project observed couples trying new sexual positions and found that both men and women made noises during sex, though these sounds varied by gender [sources: Duska, et al.]
So why do so many women scream? If screaming makes you uncomfortable, you’re probably wondering if you should keep doing what you’ve been doing because it feels good for you. The answer is yes — even if it seems kind of weird. “Vocalizing during sex may be something that people feel embarrassed about,” says Dr. David Ley, author of several books on sexuality including Why Men Love Bitches and How To Be A Man (which includes an entire chapter on how to please a woman). “But it’s really no different from moaning during sex.”
Ley explains that vocalization during sex works much the same way as making other types of sounds work during sex. Like whistling, humming or saying words like “yeah” or “oh yeah,” your voice becomes part of the experience and helps create feelings of intimacy between you and your partner. Plus, the sound might also inspire him to go harder. “When you say ‘Oh my God!’ it’s very likely that he will want to do things that are more intense,” says Ley.
Another reason that women scream is simply because they enjoy yelling. In fact, most of those surveyed in the aforementioned studies were married with children and had either gone through divorce or separated from their husbands at least once. So they weren’t being yelled at or punished, which usually leads to less enthusiasm about sex. When couples have a lot going on outside of bedroom duties, it can take away from the pleasure of sex. But when women get to scream freely, they often find themselves enjoying it even more.
And there is definitely evidence that certain kinds of screams can actually help you achieve orgasms. One researcher studied the effects of various kinds of sounds on women’s ability to orgasm. She divided her subjects into three groups based on whether they typically used screaming, shouting or whimpering during sex. Then she played recordings of each type of sound over a set of headphones and asked her volunteers to rate their level of arousal. Her results showed that the participants’ overall levels of excitement increased significantly whenever they heard any of the sounds. However, only the group that heard screams reported achieving an orgasm, suggesting that those particular cries could trigger a release of oxytocin, which is known to promote relaxation and feelings of bonding.
Now don’t think that all women scream during sex. As noted earlier, some of them do, but others just moan to help their partners reach climax faster. Or maybe they shout because they’ve been practicing their lines for their next porn shoot. Some women even use screaming to communicate pain. It’s important to remember that screaming isn’t inherently bad; it’s just something that you need to experiment with to determine what works best for you.
If you’re worried about sounding too masculine, you can try changing the pitch of your voice. Just raise it slightly higher than normal and speak slowly. You’ll still sound natural without losing your femininity.
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